Happy Wednesday Ms. Heel,
Welcome to the newest feature of our blog--the Male Bag.
That's right, we'll be diggin into the mail bag (so to speak) and answering questions and breaking down situations we've found ourselves in, our friends' relationships (if we get permission to dish) and celebrity get downs every Wednesday, in order to get you ready for the weekend--just in case you got a hot date planned for Friday or Saturday.
And what better day than hump day, to deal with our men issues.
Cuz who amongst us, doesn't have a man in our lives that we so love, wanna love or no longer love? Unless of course you're on the other team, orrrr, is that on the same team?...O'gawd, you get my point.🤔
And for our avid male readers, prepare to learn about women, from women! Your bros don't know everythang about us!
Alrighty then boys & girls, let's do this!
WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT IN A MAN?
What's your flava? Is it his money/fame? Is it societal/family pressure to be married? Or are you simply tired of being alone and willing to date anyone?
Whatcha want Ms. Heel?!!
Without being able to truly answer this question, you'll be spinning your wheels and dating any and everybody that asks!
I am so aware of the man I want, that I don't give out my number, unless I can even imagine kissing him, does he adorn himself in a way I can tolerate (for instance: saggin' pants need NOT apply), does he impress me with his speech and can I see myself introducing him (proudly) to friends and family. My reasoning for doing this immediately? Duhh...before any sexual feelings take over and get me all in my feelings!
Usually in the beginning of a relationship, is when your most honest, truthful and meaningful opinions of him, isn't clouded at all. How many times have you started dating a guy that you really didn't like, and went out with him due to boredom and the next thang ya know, Ol boy (especially if his bedroom skills are unmatched by any other lover), got you hooked?!
Now, you're overlooking his part-time pharmaceutical sales & delivery gig😉, he's promising to leave her at some point this year or those explosive, angry outbursts are due to his high stress job--yeah right!
Gurrrlll, you in trouble!
So what's the remedy?
Well if you've already accepted that date, then while on the date--ask lots of questions! Inquiring minds need to know all kinds of thangs! NEVER be afraid to ask tons of questions. Let him do all the talking. This is how you find out the most pertinent information; he'll be at ease, a lil liquor is flowing and he feels comfortable. And to be very clear: PLEASE ask the following on the first date:
is he married?
is it complicated?
what's his vice to relax? And if he likes to indulge in substances classified as narcotics, are you ok with that?
does he have a job -vs- a career?
does he want to be married (if not already married)?
does he want to have children?
does he have a criminal record? And is he currently on probation?
what's his religion?
political party affiliation?
does he have an ex-wife and/or a baby mama(s)?
future plans for himself?
And when it's all said and done, still Google his ass at the end of the date, now that you have more background information.
But now that this date or relationship is over, start making a list of your ideal mate. Yes, like as soon as you finish reading this blog. Make a list, not just of physical qualities, but of spiritual, emotional, and social things you want in your man. And adhere to it very closely from here on out...and yet, remain flexible! Sometimes, your best mate shows up in the most unexpected ways.
Never the less Ms. Heel, guess what? All that question asking will pay dividends. He'll start to feel like he can truly open up, be himself, and talk to you. Aha, you're getting in his head!
And one must get in his head, before jumping in his bed.
But that's a whole other blog ...like next week!😘